What am I suppose to do ?

How can I get her out of my mind? How should I do it? It is getting very difficult for me. We had a discussed and a satisfactory break up, well no break up satisfactory, but yeah, we were okay with it. Even I was, till the day I met her, 6 months after the break up, we met as friends, but when she left....

Man what is this? This is not fair; this shouldn’t be happening with me. Is this obvious? Does this happen with everyone? I am not able to sleep at nights, whenever I close my eyes, her innocent and beautiful face appears, I just visualize her smiling at me, she teasing me in her typical cute ways, hitting me, winking at me, blowing air at my face.

I want to be normal, sleep normally; rather I would love to watch ghosts and monsters instead of her beautiful, cute, sexy, mesmerizing, heavenly, gorgeous, hypnotizing face, whenever I close my eyes. I would not mind that, not at all.

Every song I hear, may it be in Hindi, English, Marathi or even Spanish, (Spanish because language isn’t the bar), I relate the song to her and start missing her. It’s been nearly 12 hours and I have not spoken to her, not even she has sent me a single SMS (text), and these stupid radio stations are continuously playing stupid love songs, damn you RJs. Useless buggers don’t have a heart.

What should I do? We separated for a reason, and that reasons still exists. It is like I can’t be with her and will die if I am not. I don’t even know what is she thinking? Is she missing me the way I do? I hope not, because this is hell, and I can’t see her like that. I shouldn't have met her at the first place. This sucks. Love is just meant for screwing you or may be just half reached love like this.

The name I gave to my blogging account is “The Heart-Mind Connection”, where the hell is it now? Heart wants her, wants her badly and mind thinks practically and has given a solid reason why I shouldn’t be with her, damn you 'my mind'.

What am I suppose to do?